I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
