But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
Please remind me tomorrow that I ate a loaf of jimmy johns bread on the toilet 5 mins ago
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Randomize
