I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize