Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize