we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize
