How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
