we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Randomize
