another moral hangover. fuck.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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