i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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