What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Randomize
