Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Sorry I didn't pick up for your booty call. I usually am asleep at 4:00 on Thursdays. Like a normal person.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
Randomize