dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
