I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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