I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Randomize
