Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Randomize
