I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
