I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
