You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm putting his belongings the garage sale so he can buy his own stuff back. # divorced life. Thanks for cheating on me you tone deaf dick biscuit that'll be $20. Haha.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
