I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
i just walked downstairs to find my brother wearing a crossingguards vest and boxers. when i asked him where he got it he just looked at me, smiled, and kept feeding the dog yogurt
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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