You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Randomize
