glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
I think I sprained my soul last night
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
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