their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
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