Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.

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(407): View more from Florida

Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.

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(201): View more from New Jersey

bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems

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(510): View more from California

just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

Walk of Shame time yet?

(1+44): View more from

Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?

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(845): View more from New York

We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.

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(509): View more from Washington

I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?

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(757): View more from Virginia

Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?

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(863): View more from Florida

you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...

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