love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize