No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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