we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
My new years resolution is going to be to stop drunk snapchatting old hook ups asking them when we're going to bang again
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
