another moral hangover. fuck.
He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
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