You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
