It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Randomize