I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
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