Having a random hookup so left but love u
Nicole vs. Life
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
Randomize
