Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I can't answer my phone I'm at work
I slept with a male stripper last night. Priorities
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize
