My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
