what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Randomize
