Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
Randomize
