do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
