writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
