He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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