Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
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