Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Never joke about your clitoris.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
Randomize
