my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
As shirtless as possible
idk but i can hear her singing "Call Me Maybe" really slowly and emotionally in the shower right now
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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