I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
