just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
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