I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
Randomize
