u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
Randomize
