you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
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