Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
Explaining that I bought them at a strip club gift shop with my friend didnt make the furry handcuffs seem less weird
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
Randomize
