toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
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