i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
