I puked a lego.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
Let's just grow old together and be the crazy ladies that sit on the park bench, drinking booze from flasks and loudly talk about people who walk by.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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